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 Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:13 am Post subject: Homophobia |
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How would you define homophobia?
Does it strictly mean a radical stance, where you can't stand the sight of gay people, and fight against their rights?
Or would you also call homophobic being uncomfortable with people revealing their homosexuality?
I ask because I have recently learned that some of my acquaintances from high school have come out of the closet and for some reason, I feel strange about it. I would not avoid them, if I saw them on the street, nor would I call them names, but I do feel differently about them.
Does that make me homophobic? I don't want to attribute that label to myself, but then again, what exactly does this label describe?
Thoughts...? |
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| Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:44 am Post subject: |
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nathaliejcaron wrote:
| Quote: | How would you define homophobia?
Does it strictly mean a radical stance, where you can't stand the sight of gay people, and fight against their rights?
Or would you also call homophobic being uncomfortable with people revealing their homosexuality?
I ask because I have recently learned that some of my acquaintances from high school have come out of the closet and for some reason, I feel strange about it. I would not avoid them, if I saw them on the street, nor would I call them names, but I do feel differently about them.
Does that make me homophobic? I don't want to attribute that label to myself, but then again, what exactly does this label describe?
Thoughts...? |
No it does not make you homophobic (fearing gays) it makes you sane because you look and act toward the new gays in a worse way now because they have been lying to you there whole lives. Not only that but it's reasonable that some girls say away from boys because they don't want do be ogled, why should that not apply to men and gays? I would find your situation weird to be in and while I have many gay friend's that does not necessarily mean I will endorse any of my straight friends decision to come out of the closet. |
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| Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:50 am Post subject: |
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| Ps:nathaliejcaron are you a girl? because that may change a bit of my argument(most would still be the same). |
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| Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:54 am Post subject: |
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| Rusty Bedsprings wrote: | | Ps:nathaliejcaron are you a girl? because that may change a bit of my argument(most would still be the same). |
I am a girl yes...
I am referring to acquaintances coming out from both sex tho.
I do feel like there was a sense of being lied to, but in another way, I shouldn't even care, probably... It's just been bugging me, and I can't quite put my finger on why. |
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SFrank85
Joined: 03 Mar 2007
Posts: 2269
  
votes: 4
Location: Toronto - Scarborough Southwest
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| Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 10:52 am Post subject: |
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Homophobia is a word that is used all too often, which has watered down the real meaning.
That does not make you homophobic. I old church friend of mine recently came out of the closet, which shocked all of us. He now lives in a condo in the Church/Wellesley area of Toronto, which is the gay centre in Toronto. I still can’t get over the fact that he is gay, and in the process renounced his faith. |
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| Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 10:57 am Post subject: |
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| nathaliejcaron wrote: | | Rusty Bedsprings wrote: | | Ps:nathaliejcaron are you a girl? because that may change a bit of my argument(most would still be the same). |
I am a girl yes...
I am referring to acquaintances coming out from both sex tho.
I do feel like there was a sense of being lied to, but in another way, I shouldn't even care, probably... It's just been bugging me, and I can't quite put my finger on why. |
No I don't think this makes you Homophobic at all.
I'm not sure if I have answer for you Natalie but I wouldn't feel lied to. I think most folks who are gay are in denial for a while and not ready to tell folks their sexual orientation. Personally I never understood the need to shout orientation from the roof tops, but thats just me.
I think when we find out that someone is gay and we never guessed some folks start to question their ability to read other folks. The inability to read others is fundamental skill one relies on in making judgments about others, be it personal or business relationships. If you miss a supposed biggie like this you can question and ponder the foundation of assumptions you make about people period.
it's sort of like finding out a partner is fooling around and you have blinded yourself to the fact for years. It was always there but you refused to see it. Makes some folks question their own thinking.....It becomes more about us then about them....My 2 cents. |
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| Posted: Tue Dec 30, 2008 11:17 am Post subject: |
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| crazymamma wrote: | No I don't think this makes you Homophobic at all.
I'm not sure if I have answer for you Natalie but I wouldn't feel lied to. I think most folks who are gay are in denial for a while and not ready to tell folks their sexual orientation. Personally I never understood the need to shout orientation from the roof tops, but thats just me.
I think when we find out that someone is gay and we never guessed some folks start to question their ability to read other folks. The inability to read others is fundamental skill one relies on in making judgments about others, be it personal or business relationships. If you miss a supposed biggie like this you can question and ponder the foundation of assumptions you make about people period.
it's sort of like finding out a partner is fooling around and you have blinded yourself to the fact for years. It was always there but you refused to see it. Makes some folks question their own thinking.....It becomes more about us then about them....My 2 cents. |
You make some very good points.
I agree that orientation isn't something that should be necessarily exposed, but when you think about it, I can't help but expose the fact that I am straight whenever I discuss my boyfriend, or my relationship. I guess they have a right to not have to censor themselves, but there is definitely a difference between mentioning that in passing, and suddenly yelling it to anyone who can hear it, and turning into an activist in the process... That's too "in my face" for my liking.
I guess you are also right about the ability to read people. I used to think I had a really good "gay-dar" as some call it. And some of these folks who have come out recently I used to think were gay a long time ago... But after denying it for so long and persisting in dating girls or guys, I started telling myself I had been wrong to assume that... And by the same token skewed my ability to read people who showed similar traits... And now, suddenly I feel cheated because I was lied to, and most of all, it led me to misinterpret facts outside their specific situation... Not sure if you follow me here.
I do understand that many of them were probably in denial until recently, where they felt they were in a better place to express their orientation... I just don't quite understand the need for denial these days, when in fact it just leads everyone in the wrong direction...
Does that make sense? |
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| Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 7:53 am Post subject: Re: Homophobia |
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| nathaliejcaron wrote: | How would you define homophobia?
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I think the original definition was someone who based gays because they were afraid that they were gay themselves. I never used to believe in that concept, but over time I have seen a limited number of people who seem to qualify. For whatever reason there seems to be lots of hard-core gay bashers who get caught (Larry Craig for example).
This was a concept used by the left to imply anybody who hates gays must be secretly gay - which of course is silly.
I think the modern definition is someone who hates homosexuals. Again, I think that group of people is somewhat limited as well. The person on here who stated that AIDS was really a conspiracy and it was homosexual habits that caused AIDS symptoms would qualify (just like people who happen to think the holocaust did not happen tend to be anti-semites)
I would tend to be like you. I really don't like the concept of homosexuality. On the other hand, that is MY problem, not theirs. If I let my personal social conservative views influence my behavior, I am being a jerk. |
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| Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 8:26 am Post subject: |
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Literally speaking, "homo" means same, and "phobia" means fear.
So the literal translation of "homophobia" is actually "fear of sameness".
I guess identical twins will be having problems... |
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mrsocko
Joined: 29 Oct 2006
Posts: 2453
votes: 8
Location: Southwestern Ontario
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| Posted: Sat Jan 10, 2009 10:58 am Post subject: |
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| I think you may feel wierd about the situation because you may have confided in these people and it seems they are not who they said they were(in some regard). Some times when we open ourselves up to people and they are not open and forthright with us it can leaves us feeling exposed. |
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Azurite
Joined: 22 Mar 2009
Posts: 12
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| Posted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 4:09 pm Post subject: |
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I don't have a problem with gays forming relationships and expressing their identity. I do have a problem with activist attempts to stifle religious freedom and expression.
Canada is the second largest country in the world. We have room for both the Ellen Show and the Old Testament. |
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| Posted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 6:44 pm Post subject: |
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I think Homer Simpson best explains our stright view with Homosexuals:
"I like my men straight, and my homosexuals FLAMING"
In reference to his frustration in being unable to identify certain homosexuals. Quite funny.
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| Posted: Sun Mar 22, 2009 8:09 pm Post subject: |
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| Homophobia is the opposite of Heterophobia. |
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